Am I Blue?

I watch a fair amount of basic cable TV, and I don’t have a DVR, which means I see a lot of commercials. Most of them are inoffensively awful and generally unmemorable. There are some standouts; Geico seems to get more annoying with every new commercial generation, the J.G. Wentworth jingle never fails to stick irritatingly in my head, and the FreeCreditScore.com band seems strangely sinister ever since I read Fred Clark’s enlightening argument about credit scores. I will, however, admit to a general love for the goofy, transparent commercials of the obviously shady “Education Connection,” especially this one.

But the reason I’m writing this post is because of Blue Tax. If you haven’t had the pleasure, Blue Tax is one of the many organizations that have popped up in this economy to allegedly help out people who owe back taxes. Tell me, would you trust these people with your money, let alone your possibility of prison time and wage garnishment?

Seriously, that’s a commercial from 2010 at the latest; the company put it on their YouTube account in February of 2011. That animation would have been embarrassing fifteen years ago. ReBoot looked better than that–“Money for Nothing” looked better than that! If a company is so incompetent that they can’t put together a commercial with computer animation technology–cheap, plentiful computer animation technology–that looks like it was made in this century, then why would anyone trust them to be competent with anything else?

There’s a lot that I often don’t get about commercials right now. I don’t get why Skittles seems to want their delicious candy associated with absolute weirdness or why Mountain Dew felt it necessary to show a technicolor history of transients and hobos, but I can chalk that up to differences in marketing research or attempts to target a hipster demographic. I do not understand how a commercial this amateurish and unprofessional ever passed any organization’s marketing department. I do not understand how anyone looked at this and said “yes, these stock poser animations of people clapping, people who are stylistically nothing like our rubber-faced elfin spokesperson, are perfect. Send that to the networks.”

Unless the goal was to generate conversation about your business by putting together a laughably awful commercial that made you look completely incompetent and utterly shady, out of a misguided notion that any publicity is good publicity. In that case, mission accomplished.

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One Response to Am I Blue?

  1. Don says:

    I would expect a company called "Blue Tax" to have a commercial that was more like "We'll get your fuckin' taxes done faster than your dog can assfuck your grandmother! We'll drop what you owe like a shitlog into a German chick's mouth!"Either that or the entire commercial would consist of the phrase "Da ba dee, da ba di."

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