Leaping into the Searches

Another batch of searches for the last month, give or take.

Our drive-by pro-lifer from good ol’ North Carolina came here searching for a person’s a person no matter how small bumoer sticker. I’m afraid you won’t find any stickers to support your bumper sticker philosophy here. I know, I know, what a “bumoer.”
Related searches: a person’s a person no matter how small shirt, buy horton hears a who pro life shirt. Why not all team up and come up with your own damn slogan, rather than aping the words of a man who didn’t agree with your nutjob positions?

Someone was looking for Greek plumb, but I’m not sure if they’re looking for someone to fix their aqueduct or the ingredients for Athenian prunes.

I’m not sure who triangleman jref is, but I’m willing to bet he hates “personman Deepak Chopra.”

what fun facts do you have about punnett square – They’re more conservative than Punnett Rhombuses.

bible versus eulogy for a father – My money’s on “Eulogy for a Father,” but I prefer “Funeral for a Friend“

Someone wants to know why sex ed is okay and distributing condoms is not. I don’t know, because some people have latex allergies? I don’t see why they aren’t both okay.

stephanie miller claims 9-11 conspiracy – I sure hope not; I like Stephanie Miller.

Theology Class 2007 – “The 10-year reunion for the Theology Class of 2007 has been cancelled due to Rapture.”

average lifespan in first century judea – I’m not sure what it was, but you definitely can’t thank the Romans for it.

newton’s laws+shakespeare – A sonnet in iambic pentameter tends to stay in iambic pentameter unless acted upon by an outside spondee.

our thou art in barrels – Pilsner’s laws+shakespeare

sex ed for grown-ups movie – Yes, we call that “pornography.”

sex pun – The doctor’s wife to the divorce lawyer: “all I felt was a little prick.”

to be dah doo be doo – “You know Shakespeare?” “Maybe if you hum a few bars.”

why am i an athiest? – Because you don’t believe in god, maybe?

i trek ergo sum – As Trekkie slogans go, I prefer “I grok Spock.”